Mind Rams Week 1: Thoughts and Feelings

Introduction

This week, we will spend some time getting to know our emotional bodies. Often, we try to ignore the emotions that feel not-so-great, the emotions that are part of the human experience: sadness, frustration, anger. We tend to learn towards the emotions that feel better: happiness, contentment, joy.

But, have you ever taken time to get to know yourself, and how your body feels with all different experiences – emotionally, mentally, and physically?

Setting Expectations – Realistically and Attainably

As we launch into the first official week of this email program, it is first important to set expectations for yourself. As we explore our emotions, sometimes this can be difficult to process through. Remember to speak to yourself the way you would speak to a friend: with compassion, love, and acceptance. Any goal you achieve, big or small, should be celebrated.

When it comes to setting expectations for ourselves, it’s more sustainable if we set goals that are smaller to start. If your goal is to practice mindfulness every single day – that is a fantastic goal to have! However, what are the smaller goals that you can take along that path to having a mindful practice that are realistic and attainable? If you want to practice daily for 30 minutes, what can you achieve this semester to help you meet that goal? What about this month? This week?

Consider setting goals for yourself that are SMART:



Consider a SMART goal to set for yourself during this email program over the next month. Maybe your goal is…

• By the end of the Mindful Rams program, I will practice a new mindfulness exercise twice a week.
• By the end of the semester, I will attend 2 programs on campus that help support my mindfulness.
• By the end of the month, I will identify 1 person who will be my support system/accountability buddy.

What goal do you hope to achieve through this program? Write it down and revisit this goal as often as you need.

Pleasant Events vs. Unpleasant Events

As we consider the goals we want to achieve, it’s also important to recognize that there may be roadblocks along the way. Throughout our days, we are going to experience things that are both pleasant and unpleasant – this is part of the human experience. When we experience a pleasant event, we are typically content with the outcome that is happening: getting a good grade on an exam, having a fit of laughter with friends, hitting a homerun in a baseball game.

The opposite is true of unpleasant events, and the things we don’t typically enjoy experiencing: failing the exam after cramming, getting into an argument with a friend, losing the game you’ve been practicing for.

It's important to take time with yourself to recognize how you feel – emotionally, mentally, and physically – with each type of event that occurs. Being able to name our emotions associated with certain event types in our life helps us understand what activates specific responses in us, and also helps us know what tools to pull out to help us process through the unpleasant experiences we may encounter.

To get to know yourself in this capacity, you can take some time to reflect on a pleasant experience and an unpleasant experience. First, think of a time within the last week that you enjoyed what was happening, something that brought you happiness or contentment. When you have the moment in mind, pause to ask yourself the following questions and write your reflections down:



Next, think of a time within the last week that you were not thrilled by the outcome of what was happening, something that brought you discomfort or frustration. When you have the moment in mind, pause to ask yourself the following questions and write your reflections down:




Any time you are experiencing a pleasant or unpleasant event, try and take a moment to pause and ask yourself these questions. Using a model from Jon Kabat-Zinn in Full Catastrophe Living, take time over the next week to recognize these moments and ask yourself these questions. This will allow you to get to know yourself just a little bit deeper, to know how your body reacts and responds in different ways.

What are our emotions?

When thinking of pleasant and unpleasant events, we need to be able to identify what our emotions are and put a name to them. We can think of our emotions in two broad categories: comfortable emotions and uncomfortable emotions.

Our comfortable emotions are the ones that typically feel nice: happy, loved, confident, and playful; our uncomfortable emotions typically aren’t as enjoyable: sad, scared, angry, and embarrassed.

Have you ever felt a certain way, and couldn’t put your finger on how to describe it? Using an emotion wheel is a great way to help you put emotions into words. Try starting with the broad categories – was the emotion comfortable or uncomfortable? Work your way to the outside of the wheel to get more specific at naming the emotion you are feeling.
 

Once you have identified the emotion, do a check in with yourself: how are you feeling physically? Mentally? Can you record down how you’re feeling when you are experiencing with this emotion? If so, do you notice any trends, such as:

• Most times that you’re feeling anxious, your stomach is bothering you
• Most times that you’re feeling grateful, you tend to view things in a more positive/glass-half-full view
• Most times that you’re feeling hurt, you stop responding to texts from friends

Check in with your emotions: what do they feel like? How can you support yourself when you are feeling uncomfortable emotions?

Another helpful practice when it comes to processing our emotions is the RAIN strategy:

• R: Recognize – identify the emotion you are feeling
• A: Acknowledge – accept the feeling and allow it to be there
• I: Investigate – explore your emotions with a sense of openness and curiosity
• N: Non-identify - consciously avoid being defined by that emotion

Try This Activity!

This week, take some time to explore your emotions. At least four times this week, take a few minutes out of your day and reflect on: What’s happening in your world and the world? What emotions come up, and where do you notice them in your body: physically, emotionally, or otherwise? How can you care for yourself or others?

Please feel free to utilize this worksheet as you track your progress, or write your reflections in a notebook: https://bit.ly/exploringemotions. This worksheet is also attached to this email as a PDF.

Questions for this week? Contact Associate Director Catie Baxter at cbaxter@wcupa.edu for assistance.

Next Mindful Rams email: Monday, April 14

Direct links for resources referenced above:

• https://content.randomhouse.com/assets/9780345539724/view.php?id=fcl001
• https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/how-to-write-smart-goals
• https://humansystems.co/emotionwheels/
• https://www.mindful.org/rain-a-mindfulness-practice-for-welcoming-your-emotions/